Let’s Assume the Kim Kardashian Marriage Was Legit

November 3, 2011

The best reason to think that the Kim Kardashain-Kris Humphries marriage wasn’t a sham, is that if it was pre-scripted, it would not have ended before the current season of the reality show was over.  But the point of this post is to assume that the E! producers are better storytellers than to concoct a 72 day marriage.

Let’s assume that a woman could spend months and months planning an extravagent, televised wedding, and give up on the underlying marriage 73 days later.  Before the ink on the Nielsen ratings had even dried.  What assumptions can be made about such a woman?

1.  She didn’t love her husband.  Or didn’t know her husband well enough to love him.

You have to assume that Kim must have liked Kris on some level, or she never would’ve considered his marriage proposal.  Unless she’s the type of woman who has become so enchanted with the popular mythology about weddings that she overlooked the basic point of getting married. But if it was actual love, it wouldn’t be possible to go so quickly through the progressive levels of conflict that would lead to irreconcilable differences.

And now that the marriage is in trouble, she didn’t have the common decency to call her husband before she filed the papers?  Isn’t that a completely different level of antipathy than a simple break-up? A person simply can’t go from love to hate so quickly unless he was truly, deeply worthy of hate, or she never started from a position of love.

2. She has no control over her life, except when looking at through her rear-view mirror.

Whether it’s her natural personality, the family she was raised in, or the twisted reality-tv reality she lives in, Kim Kardashian is incapable of the basic foresight that would be required to ask oneself “do I really want to get married?”  Yet she has the narcissism required to make similarly impestuous decisions like “shouldn’t I go ahead and get divorced since things aren’t perfect in my 2 month old marriage?”

The bottom line is this:  Kim Kardashian is a sociopath. 

Whether it’s a pathology caused by being born to OJ Simpson’s shyster golf buddy and Bruce Jenner’s manager/baby factory/pimp/second wife, with big boobs and prediliction for sex tapes with wannabe R&B singers, or whether it was caused by being involved in the vapid, voyeuristic perversion-of-entertainment TV factory that decided she was better than the rest of us, she is simply somebody we should not be celebrating in any way, shape, or form.

Kris Humphries is a martyr for the world’s pop culture self-respect.
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